What is an au pair?
An Au Pair is a surprisingly low cost solution to many people’s requirements for flexible and intelligent childcare.
Note: All references to au pair girls apply also to male au pairs.
An Au Pair is a young girl or boy who goes to a foreign country and lives with a Host Family for an agreed period. Their main aim is to improve their knowledge of the local language.
The Au Pair helps the Family to look after the children and with the daily household duties. In return she receives board and lodging and weekly pocket money.
The Au pair is integrated into the family and into their daily life with the same rights and obligations as other family members. The family helps the au pair improve her knowledge of the language and to get to know the local culture.
Wherever possible the Au Pair will have meals with the family and will participate in their daily activities. Families must take into account that au pairs are not employee nor student, but have a special status between both concepts.
It is necessary that the Au Pair has a basic knowledge of the host country language. To host an Au Pair is cheaper than paying the wages of a nanny. An Au Pair can be female or male however most families ask for females. Boys can be accepted if it can be proved they have some experience of looking after children and of household duties.
What is a host family?
A host family is a family that reaches an agreement with a young foreign student called an Au Pair to welcome her into their house for an agreed period. The Au Pair takes care of the children and helps with simple domestic tasks. In return, the family offers food and lodging, treats her as a member of the family, helps her to attend language classes and pays her pocket money every week.
Types of au pair
- Au Pair
Works 25 hours per week and baby sits two evenings per week. Pocket money varies depending on host country.
UK: £65 per week minimum.
France: Between €275 and €300 per month, minimum.
Spain: €60 per week minimum.
Au Pair Plus
Works 35 hours per week and baby sits two evenings per week. Pocket money varies depending on the host country:
UK: £75 per week minimum - £100 per week
France: Between €300 and €400 per month, minimum
Spain: €75 per week minimum
Summer Au Pair
A Summer Au Pair is one who wants to improve their knowledge of a language but is only available over the summer holidays.
As children do not attend school there will be more work and being a short stay, the family will need someone very adaptable.
Pocket money will depend on the type of Au Pair required by the family (Au Pair, or Au Pair Plus).
The amounts of pocket money shown above are only for reference as pocket money paid to the Au Pair has to be agreed between the family and the au pair.
If a family has three or more children or need an Au Pair who can drive, or if they have under two year olds, we suggest paying slightly more, as the work involved is more. This will encourage Au Pairs to accept your family.
Who can become an Au Pair?
- Young people between 17 and 30 years old
- Single and without children
- With a basic knowledge of the host country language and a desire to improve it
- Responsible, honest and adaptable
- Like children, and have some childcare experience
- Have some experience of household duties
- Healthy
- Willing to live with a host family from 3 months up to 2 years.
- No criminal record
Nationalities
An Au Pair can be a citizen from any country belonging or not belonging to the European Union, as long as she fulfills the legal requirements demanded by the authorities of the host country.
An Au Pair from EU countries just need a Passport or an Identity Card.
An Au Pair coming from countries outside the EU will need a Visa issued by the host country Consulate. If you choose a candidate from a country which is not a member of the EU, you must enquire from the local authorities if the girl can be an au pair.
Au Pair Duties
The Au Pair not only takes care of the children but also helps with light household duties.
There are families which might require the Au Pair to do less housework and take more care of the children and others which might ask for more housework and less child care.
Childcare can include:
- Dressing and feeding them
- Cooking for them
- Changing nappies
- Taking them to and picking them up from school
- Helping with homework
- Playing with them
- Bathing them and getting them ready for bed
- Doing creative things with them
- Introducing the children to activities which stimulate growth and development
Household duties can include:
- Help to keep the house clean and tidy
- Dusting and vacuuming
- Doing washing and ironing
- Preparing breakfast and simple meals for the children
- Tidy up the kitchen
- Taking care of the house, animals and plants when the family is out.
The Au Pair should never be asked to:
- Clean the whole house
- Clean the bathrooms
- Clean the family car
- Do the garden
- Cook dinner or lunch for the family (although sometimes it might be nice, as an exception!)
- Clean up the wardrobes
- Clean the family’s shoes but only the children's shoes
The family must always have in mind that an Au Pair is not a servant. She must be treated as a member of the family, with respect and kindness.
If there is additional work during school holidays, this should be clear at the time of the offer and reasonable additional pocket money offered in return.
The Children
In the beginning, the children might have difficulty in adjusting themselves to the Au Pair so she will have to work hard to earn their trust and co-operation. The first few weeks are very important, since the relationship the Au Pair has with the children she is in charge of could set the duration of her stay with your family and it might make or break the success of the placement.
We always advise our au pairs to follow these guidelines:
- To be flexible and try to adapt as well as they can to the house and children’s routine
- To continue the daily patterns the children follow, to help them to feel secure
- Not to try and impress her personality at first
- To be tolerant and not to force the issue
- Play with things they enjoy, lego, modeling, painting, whatever they like.
- To avoid confrontation with the children
The Travel
The Au Pair will pay the travel cost although there are families who like to help. In some cases, the family pays the return travel if the Au Pair has stayed for the agreed time. Make sure this is clear in advance.
The family must collect the au pair from the point of arrival (airport, train or bus station). They will be informed of the Au pair’s travel plans by the agency.
Before the au pair travels, make sure you have her mobile phone number and she has yours in case of mishaps with travel arrangements or pick up arrangements!
In the event the Family could not collect the Au Pair from the point of arrival or make the necessary arrangements for any other properly identified person to pick her up, then a taxi should be provided if the Family's house is within a reasonable distance of the point of arrival. (25 miles/50km).
If the house is further away, the Family should send the Au Pair detailed information on transport that she can take to get to their house. All this information must be in the hands of the Au Pair before she makes any travel arrangements.
The Family must reimburse the Au Pair from the first point of arrival to the second point where families MUST COLLECT THEM.
Au Pair Accommodation
The family will provide the Au Pair with her own room and full board. If it is not possible to provide her with her own bathroom it is better if she shares the children’s bathroom.
As a minimum the Au Pair should have in her room a bed, some storage for her clothes, a desk or table where she can study, a radio/CD player and an alarm clock. A TV will be appreciated and will give her the freedom to choose programmes to help practice her English and to entertain her.
It will be appreciated if the children understand that the Au Pair’s room is private, and that they should knock on the door if they want the au pair.
Language Classes
The Au Pair is entitled to attend language classes and exams. The Family should assist her in finding the most convenient and suitable classes and the nearest language school to their house.
The Au Pair will pay for the language classes but some families like to help to pay or pay for the exam fees.
The Family should adapt their daily schedule to allow the Au Pair to attend language classes, as her main objective in coming to the country is to improve her knowledge of the language.
If the au pair needs to take public transport to go to college, the Family should pay for it or at least contribute to a weekly bus pass. Transport in the UK is expensive and Au Pairs are not earning very much money!
Telephone and Internet
The Family should make clear to the Au Pair when and under what conditions she is allowed use of the telephone and the internet. At the time of writing Talk Talk are offering free calls to Europe and Canada, Australia and New Zealand for only an extra £3 per month. Might be worth checking it out! Otherwise most Au Pairs are pretty skilled at skyping and most bring their own lap tops.
Driving Au Pair
Should the family require the Au Pair to drive it is their responsibility. It needs to be carefully considered as the Au Pair will be driving your children around on unfamiliar roads.
It is the responsibility of the Family to ensure that necessary documentation, driving license and experience are sufficient for the Au Pair to drive in the host country, prior to acceptance. The Family must pay all vehicle expense (petrol, insurance, repairs etc.) Families cannot expect an Au Pair to pay for damage caused to a vehicle. Please ensure you have adequate cover on your car insurance.
Nannies and Childcare are not liable in any respect with regard to this matter.
Driving Au Pairs are taking extra responsibilities and should be paid extra, about £15 - £20 per week. Families may consider allowing the Au Pair use of the car for personal purposes, especially if they are out of town.
Au Pair citizens of any of the EU countries are allowed to drive in any of the countries with a valid license as long as it remains valid.
Non EU citizens are allowed to drive for one year with their local or International license after which they must take a test in the country of their choice.
WE STRONGLY ADVISE FAMILIES TO PAY FOR A FEW DRIVING LESSONS BEFORE LETTING THE AU PAIR DRIVE THE CHILDREN AROUND!!!
Medical Insurance
Au Pair nationals of any EU country can use the NHS. If an Au pair is a citizen of a non-EU country, the family should make arrangements for her to be able to get medical assistance while living in the country.
Holidays
After 6 months stay the Au Pair is entitled to one week paid holiday with a total of two weeks in 12 months.
If the Family goes on a holiday and invite the Au Pair and she accepts, they have to pay her as if she was working. They should respect her working hours. The Family must give the Au Pair the guidelines of her duties on holiday in advance.
If the family invite the Au Pair but she refuses the invitation, the Family does not have to pay her for the time they are away.
If the Family does not invite the Au Pair to go with them she has to be paid, regardless of whether she stays at home or not.
Au Pairs appreciate the chance to return home for one week at Christmas or New Year.
The Family should discuss the holidays as early as possible once the Au Pair has arrived. The Au Pair is also entitled to have public holidays as free days without loss of pay.
If you plan to take the Au Pair on holiday with you outside the EU, please check with the Travel Agent if she needs a Visa.
Weekends
Au Pairs should have two days per week free. Ideally Saturday and Sunday.